Sometimes foreplay can feel like a hassle when all you want is to rip each other’s clothes off, but this kind of sexy warm-up is actually one of the most important parts of getting it on! Most of us fall into a “we want it NOW!” mindset when it comes to having sex, but many don’t know that with a little pre-gaming TLC you can have better, more satisfying sex with orgasms that’ll blow your mind.
Better Orgasms – Because Biology!
We feel turned on when blood starts to flow more freely to our pleasure zones, and the more time you spend getting it gushing, the more sensitive you’ll feel. Penises become erect when their tube-like interiors engorge with blood and, believe it or not, clitorises do the SAME THING – they just take different amounts of time to get to that hard-and-swollen state. And that’s where foreplay comes in.
Some men can turn on and get hard in mere minutes, while others need a little coaxing to get in the mood. And most women can take up to 20 minutes (or even longer, depending on various factors) to get in the right state of mind and body, so patience is one of the most important “sex toys” we suggest to couples.
Water won’t boil in 30 seconds and you can’t have a healthy workout without a decent warm-up, right? Keep that same logic in mind and dedicate at least 10 minutes to a pre-sex “regimen” with your partner. You’ll be glad you did (and so will your partner)!
Try Erogenous Zones OTHER Than the Obvious!
Instead of going right for each other’s junk, take time to stimulate, tickle, lick, blow on (or whatever you like!) the OTHER parts of the body that respond to sexy stuff. There are so many to choose from and many of us like certain areas more than others, which is what makes foreplay so fun. Exploring to see what works great and what doesn’t work at all lets you both embark on a titillating and kinda-naughty journey on and around each other’s bodies.
Common erogenous zones include the neck, inner thighs, nipples, chest, feet, and sometimes other areas that might surprise you. So touch or tickle a sweet spot and see what your partner says – just be sure to communicate! Because unless he or she tells you “yay” or “no way,” you’ll never know if you’re doing something that feels good. You’re not a mind-reader and neither is your partner!
Like Each Other Even More!
Foreplay is recommended mostly for making sex feel better, but it’s ALSO an incredible way to get closer to your partner by building…you guessed it. Intimacy! Instead of going straight for the goal, taking the time to warm each other up lets you get comfortable with each other faster, building both of your confidence levels higher than ever. You’ll get to know each other’s bodies, feel safe and taken care of (sexually and maybe even emotionally) by your partner, and even get to the comfort level where typically embarrassing moments end up just making you laugh!
Without the stress and anxiety that can be common, sex ends up being so much more fun and frees up space for more smiling, laughing and general happiness as you get closer to doing the ultimate deed.
This heightened intimacy also allows for next-level foreplay, which might include exploring erogenous zones normally forgotten or ignored (or maybe too “advanced” for some) or even using sex toys to help enhance sensations! The perineum (aka the taint) and anus are incredibly sensitive for some men and women and using mini vibes or bullet vibrators is a great way to stimulate as you get familiar with these less-familiar areas. Even light bondage – for instance, tying arms to the bed post so your partner can take the wheel for a while – is a fun way to take foreplay up to the next level, and also signifies that you both may have reached a new level of trust that simply makes your relationship even stronger – and, chances are, the sex even better!