If you’ve ever found yourself wondering about sex toys – but hesitated because you didn’t know where to start – you’re in the right place. Whether you're solo, coupled up, or somewhere in between, exploring toys can be exciting, empowering, and yes, a lot of fun.
But we get it – stepping into this world for the first time can feel intimidating. There are so many options, unfamiliar terms, and different materials that it’s easy to get overwhelmed.
So let’s slow things down. This guide is for you if you’ve ever thought:
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“I’m curious, but nervous.”
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“I want to try something simple.”
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“I don’t know what would feel good for me.”
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“I want to spice things up with my partner.”
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“I’m ready to explore, but I want to feel safe and informed.”
Sound familiar? Perfect. Let’s start from the beginning.
Why Try a Toy in the First Place?
There’s no one-size-fits-all reason, but here are a few benefits many first-timers enjoy:
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More pleasure. Toys can enhance arousal, sensation, and satisfaction.
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More knowledge. You’ll learn what you like, what you want more of, and how your body responds.
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Better communication. If you’re with a partner, talking about toys opens the door to deeper intimacy.
Confidence boost. Exploring toys gives you control over your pleasure and body. -
Better solo play. Toys can make solo time more stimulating and satisfying.
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Deeper connection. When used with a partner, toys can reignite the spark and offer new ways to bond.
And most importantly – it’s fun. Sex and pleasure are natural parts of life. Toys are just tools to help you enjoy them more.
Getting Comfortable: Questions Newbies Ask
Is it normal to want to try a sex toy?
Yes. Very. Millions of people around the world use toys – whether they’re single, dating, married, young, older, or exploring something new. Trying a toy doesn’t mean something is wrong. It means you’re curious about your body and open to growth.
Is it safe?
As long as you choose toys made from body-safe materials (like silicone, ABS, or SEBS), you’re in good hands. Stay away from toys with phthalates or mystery materials.
Will it hurt?
Not at all – if you choose the right toy, start slowly, and use lubrication (especially water-based lube for silicone toys). Pain is never the goal; pleasure, curiosity, and comfort are.
Do I have to use it with a partner?
Not unless you want to! Toys can be used alone, with someone else, or even just as a way to better understand your own body before bringing that knowledge into your relationships.
What to Look For in a First Toy
Here are some good first-time principles:
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Small in size. No need to start with anything large or complicated.
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Simple to operate. One-button controls are ideal.
Quiet. If discretion matters, many toys have whisper-quiet motors. -
Rechargeable or battery-powered. Both are fine, but rechargeable toys are more eco-friendly and cost-effective over time.
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Waterproof. Great for easy cleaning or bath/shower fun.
Let's Break Down the Categories
There’s no rulebook for where to begin, but here are a few categories that are popular for first-timers – with specific product suggestions when you're ready to explore.
External Toys for Beginners
These are toys that stimulate the outside of your body – no penetration involved. They're easy to control, great for exploration, and perfect for those new to toys.
Bullet Vibrators
Why try it: Small, simple, and powerful. Ideal for clitoral stimulation, nipples, or any external zones that feel good to touch.
Great for: Solo play, warming up, or adding to foreplay.
Try this: Rechargeable Bullets – Compact, powerful, and discreet. Ideal for personal use or with a partner.
Finger Vibrators
Why try it: Adds vibration to your fingers for more sensation. It’s like giving your hand superpowers.
Great for: Couples or solo play where you want more control.
Try this: Fingo Tips® – Slip-on fingertip vibes that are soft, comfortable, and surprisingly strong.
Toys for Couples
Want to spice things up together? These toys are made to be used during intimacy – enhancing the experience for both partners.
Vibrating Rings
Why try it: These rings are worn around the base of the penis and offer shared stimulation. Vibrations can enhance sensation for both partners.
Great for: Partner play, lasting longer, and mutual satisfaction.
Try this: Charged™ O Wow® Ring – A rechargeable vibrating ring for intense couples play. Long-lasting and body-safe.
Non-Vibrating Rings
Why try it: These rings don’t vibrate but help maintain stamina by applying pressure, keeping things firm and energized.
Try this: Ring-O Ritz – A luxe, stylish ring that’s easy to use and great for those curious about support rings.
Toys for Men
For those looking for solo enhancement or new sensations, these options offer textured, soft, and satisfying experiences.
Strokers and Sleeves
Why try it: Mimics the feel of touch with added texture and pressure. Great for exploring sensations you can’t get with hands alone.
Try this: Jackits® Stroker Pad – Thin, flexible, and discreet stroker pad for enhanced solo sessions.
Your First Shopping Experience – What to Expect
When you’re shopping for your first toy, it’s okay to take your time. Here’s what to keep in mind:
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There’s no pressure to buy the “perfect” toy. It’s okay to experiment.
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You can read reviews. They help you understand what real people love.
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You don’t need to spend a lot. Many beginner toys are under $20–$40.
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No one needs to know. ScreamingO offers discreet shipping and private billing names to protect your privacy.
Tips for Using Toys for the First Time
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Relax and breathe. Your comfort is key. Go slow and listen to your body.
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Use lube. Especially for external or internal play, lube reduces friction and increases pleasure.
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Start at the lowest setting. Many toys have multiple speeds – start slow and increase gradually.
Clean before and after. Use warm water and mild soap or toy cleaner. -
Charge up. Make sure your rechargeable toys are fully powered for your first use.
Common Myths (And Why They’re Not True)
“If I use a toy, my partner will feel replaced.”
Not at all. Toys are tools for more pleasure – not substitutes for connection. Many couples use toys together to explore new sensations and improve intimacy.
“Toys are only for women.”
Also false. There are toys for every body – regardless of gender, orientation, or anatomy.
“Once I start using a toy, I’ll never go back.”
Toys don’t replace natural pleasure – they just add variety. It’s like having a blender and a spoon. Sometimes you want smooth. Sometimes you want slow.
You’re Not Alone
Exploring toys for the first time isn’t just normal – it’s empowering. Whether you’re looking for more pleasure, better communication, or just a fun way to unwind, you deserve products that help you feel great about your body and your choices.
Start small. Stay curious. Shop smart. And above all – enjoy yourself.